I dated someone for a year or so who was just a walking man of extremes. Everything that he was into, he was INTO. The man didn’t have hobbies, he had passions. Being his girlfriend was great for the first few months or so because he was that guy who every kiss was like Leo and Kate’s in Titanic, and he was so interesting to get to know. He enveloped so many loves and could speak about so many topics with such flare because you could see how intensely he felt. I originally praised this quality and admired his convictions, but then it got real old, real quick.
You cease to be a passionate person when you’re brought to an unbridled frustration at a restaurants use of bendy straws rather than those which simply stand upright. I started to realize that he might be a bit unbalanced. I eventually concluded that he was pretty regularly eating a “big bowl of crazy” for breakfast and this was not going to change. He was someone with more of an issue then I had recognized before. I soon there-after ended it and asked him to leave my house and life, which he did, but not before he took not just his belongings from my home, but he also left with every non-perishable item in my pantry. He even took the last can of who-hash.
My point here is that we’re pretty quick now-a-day to brand someone a “nut” because they may have an emotional outburst, or show their frustrations in a way that differs from how you may. However, the reality is this most of these folks aren’t psycho, they’re just working out the kinks of life in general. We all encounter situations that throw us off our game, and we struggle to find that effective way to communicate without coming off like a loon, or finding you delivering multiple apologies after the dust settles. Some are better than others at this balancing, but we all have fallen short a few times I am sure.
I make all attempts to walk away from each relationship in my life and find the lesson, and what I learned from Captain Zoloft above was more or less that it’s impossible to not judge someone. We all do it, but what we need to have an abundance of is patience. We don’t know how or why or what drives someone else and their emotional lashings all the time. It’s way too simple and hypocritical for me to write “We all should just not judge anyone. Ever.”
That’s just impossible. We all judge and we all label pre-maturely. I would just suggest taking that step back when you encounter someone who comes off with a more extreme way of dealing, and give them the courtesy of your patience while they work themselves out. Granted, you will (I’m sure some time or another) come across those folks who by no stretch of the imagination are crazy. Not like 'eating pennies' crazy, but just delusional enough where they can’t grasp the reality in certain situations and take responsibity for their own actions. In those instances, I just wouldn’t recommend “poking the bear”.
Getting a good level of patience in your life will help you clearly access which folks those just figuring out their coping tactics of life, and those who are more likely to someday be accused of duck taping someone in their basement.
Happy Trails Riders!
Ladies, ever wonder where the phrase "tapped that" originated? Fella's, ever wonder if girls had slumber parties with nighties and pillow fights? Yeah, well me too. The Vagina MonoBlogs takes a proactive but honest point of view on some of these timeless questions and offers some perspectives to apply...or avoid for that matter!
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Photo of Leo and Kate from sheknows.com
Photo of zoloft bottle from sideeffectshub.com