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Sixers Non-Sixers Report: Sign Iverson and learn from a long-time foe


It's no secret in the Philadelphia region that there are three teams that we care about.  The Phillies and Eagles are beloved, with the latter taking a lot of criticism due to an arrogant front office. 
The Flyers have a loyal fanbase and are a lock to put 17,000-18,000 butts in the seats on a regular basis.
Then there's the Sixers. 
This team has become the laughing stock in Philadelphia.  Hardly anybody cares about this team anymore because of a putrid front office and a mediocre product that gives people nothing to look forward to.  Ed Stefanski, the "Philly guy" who was supposed to come in and make us forget about Billy King has managed to outdo Billy King with horrendous moves.  While Stefanski seems like a smart man and anybody who knows him has nothing but good things to say about him; the bottom line is his tenure has been an abject failure this far. If he continues on this trajectory, he'll go down as possibly the worst GM in Philadelphia since Brad Greenberg-a GM of the Sixers in the 90's who stunk worse than a week-old bag of rotten meat. 
Billy King managed to clean up the cap-mess that he created and was fired by Ed Snider who replaced him with Stefanski two years ago.  Stefanski inherited a great situation.  For the first time in nearly a decade the Sixers were in a position to make moves in free agency.  So what was his master plan for putting the Sixers back on the map? He signed Chris Webber Part II-a.k.a. Elton Brand to a big contract.  Brand was coming off a torn achilles and no longer had the explosiveness in his game that he possessed earlier in his career.  The good news is that Elton Brand only has three more years left on his 5-year $80 million contract after this year. 
And, Andre Iguodala wasn't even a free agent, but Stefanski decided to throw $80 million at him. 
If Stefanski wanted to play his cards right, he would have kept the payroll low on this team and let Iguodala walk. Then they could've let this team be bad, really bad for a few years so they could load up on high draft picks.   Look how it's done wonders for organizations like Orlando, Atlanta, and countless others.  Not the Sixers though.  They are content with getting that 7th or 8th playoff seed and stinking just enough to get a lowrent draft pick in the middle of the first round every year.
There were no free agents worth signing in 2008 or 2009.  2010 is the year of free agency when Lebron, Wade, Bosh all become free agents.  This is the year the Sixers should have made a run at a big name. 
  My message to Ed Snider (and I'm sure he'll read this because our website is awesome) is this:  BLOW UP THE TEAM! Mr. Snider, blow this team up from the top on down Kaboomand start anew.  Ed Stefanski has buried the team for the next five years in cap hell and  Eddie Jordan is going to lead this team to the land of mediocrity, which is the last thing this team needs.  At least if this team is dreadful for a few years the fans can look forward to some high draft picks. 
Again, there is nothing to look forward to on this team and that's why most people in the Philadelphia area could give a rat's behind about them.
But, while this team is in train wreck mode, they should kick this into overdrive and bring back A.I.  Not because I think he's a good player.  He will make this team an utter and complete disaster. 
With that said I see no reason to regularly report on the "state of the Sixers" or write articles about how they got blown out by the Magic, Cavs, Celtics, Lakers, Spurs or any other of the few NBA teams worth a damn.  I don't want to write about how Eddie Jordan can't lead a pack of roaches to a garbage can.  And, I don't want to write about how Andre Iguodala went 1 for 6 from 3-point range and had a couple hotdog dunks.  And, I sure as hell don't want to waste my time talking about who the Sixers should draft next year.  We all know they'll finish with 35-40 wins, which is good enough to screw themselves out of a great draft pick.
So as a public service to my fellow Philadelphia fans I've taken it upon myself to adopt an organization that knows how to get it done.  I will regularly update you on their progress. 
I want you to think about what team I'm going to reguarly report on.  Think about it for a second.

question mark
That's right.  This is a team that knows how to get it done.  They have a brilliant GM in Danny Ainge who tanked a season, signed Ray Allen and traded his high draft pick  along with some young prospects for Kevin Garnett. 
And, the rest is his...

It's a no-brainer to follow the Celtics if you ask me.  The Celtics' big man is Kevin Garnett, who will go down as one of the 10 greatest big men in NBA history before it's all said and done.  Their organization is the definition of greatness.  And, before you send in the hate mail, just hear me out.

DalembertThe Sixers have "The Praying Mantis" Samuel Dalembert as their "big man."  Dalembert isn't just a bum, he's a Super Bum. black superman
The Celtics have Ray Allen as their sharp shooter and the Sixers have a dunker who can't shoot a lick from outside the arc in the overpaid, overrated Iguodala. 

The Sixers are stuck with an over-the-hill Elton Brand for the next four years.  The Celtics have 'Sheed!
The Celtics are a "Philly team" as far as yours truly is concerned.  They are built to shut teams down on the defensive end and play blue collar basketball. 

The only type of basketball the Sixers play starts with an "S" and ends in a "T."
The Celtics currently lead the Atlantic Division with a 9-4 record.  They're coming off a tough loss last night against the Orlando Magic.  They fought back late in the 4th quarter to even it up, but the turning point is when they started playing the Rocky theme song during a timeout.  Bad idea.
The Rocky music has been a jinx to Philadelphia teams for years.  I've maintained that they should not play it during games of any significance.  Think about it.  They play that damn song during every Eagles home game and what has it gotten them? 
Gotta blame something so I'm calling it the Rocky jinx.  And, the Celtics' people should have known better than that.  Besides, Rocky belongs to Philly, not you.
With that said, the Celtics face the Knicks tomorrow then have a few days off to prep for the Sixers on Wednesday.  Well, it's not like they need to exactly prep for this gang, but it will give them some time to get their drink on and whatnot.
Stay tuned as the Sixers Non-Sixers report will become a regular staple on Philly2Philly.com.  We are an awesome website that doesn't take ourselves too seriously and we certainly don't take the Sixers seriously.  Well...I can't speak for my fellow staffers, but I know I don't!
Photo of black superman from www.leachpunk.com

Photo of Kaboom game from www.best-electronics-ca.com

Photo of Garnett from http://www.cbc.ca

Photo of Dalembert from www.yougotdunkedon.com