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The Morning After-Saints March Over Eagles

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Good morning campers.

For the newbies out there who may not be aware of this trivial tidbit, The Morning After is named after the soundtrack song of the same name from the classic 70s disaster flick, The Poseidon Adventure.

The opening stanza…

There's got to be a morning after,

If we can hold on through the night.
We have a chance to find the sunshine,
Let's keep on lookin' for the light.

Yesterday’s game typified why I named this column what I did all those years ago. See, in case you didn’t know – and quite frankly, how could you not by now – being an Eagles fan is very much like being in a disaster film.

Some mornings after, you may be Ernest Borgnine or Pamela Sue Martin, AKA survivors.

Other mornings after, like this particular one – you’re Gene Hackman and Shelley Winters… fish food.

So, join me won’t you as I look for the light

PRE GAME HIGH JINX…

From time to time I like to share some fun, head-scratching, what-are-you-smoking anecdotes I hear prior to the opening kickoff. Could be a few minutes before. Could be a few days before.

 

  • On Saturday night, my family got together to celebrate my mother’s birthday – a bigger Eagles fan you will not find by the way. Anyway, as the night was winding down, my cousin Buddy Henkels’ wife Joanne, did her best Nostradamus (or would that be Nostradame-us?) prediction: “I think Kevin Kolb won’t make it out of the 1st Quarter.”

    Well she wasn’t right, of course. However, she didn’t say which game she was referring to. For all I know she could have meant next week’s game. Hmmmmm….
     
  • For someone as well-known and well-respected as Mike Francesa (WFAN Sports Radio 66 radio host in NYC), it was quite surprising to hear him mispronounce the name of the Eagle’s starting QB. He referred to him as Kevin Cole’b during his NFL Now show on Sunday morning.

 

  • Gotta love the FOX pre-game crew of Terry, Bradshaw Howie Long, Michael Strahan, Jimmy Johnson and Curt Menefee. Each week they make their picks on a few games and they always include their “upset” specials.

    At least 3 of them (can’t recall which 3 and quite frankly, it doesn’t matter) picked the Oakland Raiders to “upset” the Kansas City Chiefs.

    Wow. Be careful on that ledge boys cause you’re really out there with this brazen selection. It was an upset alright. It was “upsetting” to hear them make this pick.

 

  • What exactly was Sheldon Brown wearing when he came out of the tunnel? A Halloween mask? Based on how you and pretty much every one of your teammates played, you may want to wear that mask next time you stop at WaWa for a cup of joe.

 

  • If this is not a law, it damn well should be…

    For the second straight week, a neighbor of MQ’s decided to fire up his mower to coincide precisely with opening kickoff.

    Veterans of the TMA will know what’s coming next…

          Paul Sorvino in Goodfellas as he’s talking to Ray Liotta  about going back to live with his wife: “I can’t have this.”

Running your lawnmower during an Eagles game: “I can’t have this.”

HOW BOUT A NICE PB&J SANDWICH?…

How bout the incredible amount of pressure and damage the trio of Mike Patterson, Broderick Bunkley and Juqua Parker caused the Saints yesterday?

Remember all those great plays they made?

Me neither.

I DON’T WANT TO ROCCA & ROLLA ALL NITE…

Why is that Eagles punter Sav Rocca can hit a booming punt when it’s least needed and when it’s most needed he turns into the second coming of Rick Tuten?

I think it’s time to say “Shonky Mate, Crikey!” which is Australian for “pack your damn bags, your ass is on a plane back to Melbourne where you can throw as many damn shrimps on the freakin’ barbie you want.”

BREAKING NEWS…

I don’t know about you, but I am so glad FOX provided us with updates on the score from the Mets/Nationals game.

Admit it, you snuck a peek too at the score in the corner of your screen.

BENEFICIALLY SPEAKING…

Let me get this straight. An exclusive sports video programming series available online only at FOXSports.com is called Lunch With Benefits?

Why does that sound like the name of an AARP Chapter Meeting?

“Join us at the local VFW for the next AARP Lunch With Benefits!”

NOT SO SPECIAL DELIVERY…

I will save you from reliving each and every horrific escapade of the Eagles Not-So-Special Teams.

But what in the name of Wally Henry was that we witnessed yesterday?

Save for one good kickoff return by Ellis Hobbs, this unit was anything but special.

A seemingly constant stream of penalties combined with a completely demoralizing fumble by the aforementioned Hobbs made for a long day for the 3rd member of the Eagles’ triumvirate.

Of course, they were hardly alone in their inept play as the offense and defense had enough of their own poor play to go around.

Make no mistake about it – this loss was a complete team effort.

REID ALL ABOUT IT…

I don’t think I’ve ever heard Andy Reid speak with such candor in a press conference as he did in the post mortem conference yesterday.

He went so far as to call this “an absolutely horrendous performance.”

Wow. Not used to hearing Big Red speak with such bluntness and I for one found it most refreshing. It was as if he was telling everyone ‘look, I can’t sugarcoat this… we pretty much sucked today.’

Something tells me this coming week will not be very pleasant for any member of the Eagles team or staff.

AT RANDOM …

Let’s go rapid fire to close this baby out:

 

  • Tremendously athletic play by LB Akeem Jordan on his tipped pass/interception which thwarted a Saints’ drive in the 2Q
  • Why did the Eagles call timeout with 7 seconds left in the game? It’s akin to telling your dentist to prolong that root canal just a tad bit longer cause you’re just enjoying the hell out of it
  • Horrifically bad non-call on the Eagles’ Chris Clemons at the end of the 1st Half. Clearly a penalty should’ve been called on the Saints for illegal use of hands. One play later, the Saints found the end zone… again.
  • Ok, so my thoughts on Kevin Kolb. I think the kid played ok. Just ok. If Donovan McNabb cannot go next week, I think Jeff Garcia should start at QB. Why? Simple. He would give the Eagles the best chance to win and that is of course, always the bottom line.
  • One last thing. I missed the 2009 Emmy Awards… Did anyone pull a “Kanye West”?

I’m done.

As always, time’s yours. Food’s mine.